The Reason I Left You
by Cherry Blossom Pie
Summary: She was breaking. The biggest part of her life had left her. She wasn't about to accept his miserable excuse, with his arms around her, under the pouring rain.


**The Reason I Left You**

I hated him. Hated him with all the power in me. Troy Bolton, legendary basketball captain, had stolen my life. Had taken everything that I'd lived for. I knew it was over. But that didn't stop my life from being ruined. I couldn't take it. Who would have ever known that my senior year would be a year of living hell?

There was nothing I could do. Third period required me to walk past the gym, and I saw him, chuckling as he brushed Sharpay Evans's hair behind her ear. She giggled her high pitched laugh, and I shuddered. The salty tears were already coming to my eyes. I got away before Troy noticed me, but a sniffle escaped from me.

Why? The question echoed through my head, reverberating in the closed, confining walls of my head. The walls that had returned after Troy left me. One year ago, I would never have felt so lonely walking by myself through the school hall. I'd have waved at Taylor when she passed me. But instead, I felt myself craving that ex-daily warmth around my waist when Troy walked me to my classes.

How could he have just given up? I had no idea. The only stupid, lame excuse he had given me was that he thought it was time to go separate ways. A few weeks later, and tada! He had a new girlfriend. It hurt. I didn't know how much heartbreak would hurt until now. I'd seen it in movies, but never in real life, or have it happen to me.

The pain was too much. I needed to go home, the only refuge I had. I'd get a note from my mom with some idiot excuse explaining my absence from class. A few tardies or absences weren't that bad. I didn't even care any more. Why should I? The biggest part of my life, the one that had edged me on, was gone. My boyfriend was gone.

I fell on my bed, finally allowing the tears to seep out. It was no good. Was this depression? I'd never experienced it before. It was scary. I thought back to all those scary articles advertising girls cutting themselves up while bloody tears dripped down their faces. Was that who I would become? Someone who had given up? But I had to stay strong. I thought back to my mom. How would she feel if I were gone? She was single, and if I ceased to exist, would she have any incentive to live anymore either? We supported each other.

It had started raining outside. I didn't care. Throwing on a warm sweatshirt, I walked out into the droplets. They merged with the salty tears cascading down my cheeks. At least no one would see my weakness. My hair stuck to my face; I probably looked horrible. Was that why Troy had broken up with me? Because he couldn't stand how bad I looked next to him?

Now I was degrading myself. Cheer up, Gabriella. Stop looking so deep into things. I sat down on the muddy grass. Who cared? Nobody was outside in this weather, and I was already wet.

Burying my face in my hands, I cried. I let the sobs racket my body. I reflected on everything. How great my life had been, until Troy had entered my life. Sure, it'd been great while he'd been there, but this was what happened when you were forced to leave someone you loved. When your loved one didn't love you anymore.

I swore that I wouldn't let anyone go so deep into my heart again. It'd happened once, but I wouldn't subject myself to this heartbreak anymore. That didn't stop the sadness rippling through me, making me feel cold and alone.

"What are you doing!?" The exclamation made me look up. Troy was looking down at me, aghast. "You're going to get a fever!" He wrapped his arms around my shoulders. The action was so familiar, I couldn't help staying in it. Then, I came to my senses. I pushed his arms away.

"Get away from me," I whimpered. My eyes were probably puffy, red, and swollen by now.

"Gabs…"

"I said to get away from me!" My voice cracked painfully. I saw his eyes fill with pity and remorse.

I slapped his arms away and got up. "I'm going now."

"I know I hurt you."

"Thanks, Einstein. I know that too." The sarcasm dripped from my voice. Hurt flickered for a moment across his eyes. Who the hell cared? That hurt was nothing compared to mine.

"You don't understand, Gabriella." He spoke slowly, carefully. I knew the sadness in his voice was fake.

"What don't I understand? You left me, you hooked up with Sharpay, and I felt like dying. There, I understand everything. So thank you, Troy, for bringing me up to date." I turned away from him.

"Wait."

I couldn't help it. My feet stopped of their own will. I listened.

"I was scared, Gabriella. It was the first time I felt something like that. I couldn't face it. I left you because I was in love with you. I thought Sharpay would stifle that pain and regret I felt after I left you. It didn't work. I saw you today passing the gym. You looked as beautiful as ever."

"Right," I snorted. "Thanks for giving me a compliment I know is just polite."

"I want you back, Gabby. Maybe I seem like one of those lame ex-boyfriends who come running back after their girlfriends catch them cheating."

"No," I said sarcastically. A small tremor in my heart steered me towards him. NO! I wouldn't do it again.

"I'm sorry for the weeks of pain I put you through. I truly am." He stepped closer. I could practically feel his warm breath on my neck.

"But if you knew the tumult of emotions I felt when I was dating you, maybe you'd understand."

"I'm sorry; I really don't get what you're hinting at."

"I love you, Gabriella Montez. That's the reason I left you."

"You seriously think I'll believe that crap?" I turned around, prepared to give him the lashing of his life. "YOU BROKE MY HEART, TROY BOLTON! YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE I'LL LET YOU DO THAT TO ME AGAIN? YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA OF THE HELL I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH IN THE PAST WEEKS. INSTEAD, YOU'VE BEEN FLIRTING WITH SHARPAY EVANS AND PLAYING BASKETBALL. YOU HAVEN'T EVEN GIVEN A SECOND THOUGHT TO WHAT I'VE BEEN FEELING!" I huffed and shivered. The rain was starting to soak into my t-shirt, and I blinked tears away.

"Maybe you think that. But you haven't seen my basketball. I can't even make a close shot into the hoop. My passing sucks. I try to flirt with Sharpay. But I can't. The only way I can do that is if I imagine her as you. I think about you every night, during every class. I might even be kicked out of the team; my grades are dropping so much."

I didn't want to believe him. Why subject myself to heartbreak again?

"You don't get it, Troy. I say the truth when I say the past weeks have been hell. You don't walk me to classes anymore. You don't hug me in the hallways, or sneak up behind me when I'm opening my locker. I don't have you with me when I'm at home, or your text messages freezing my phone. Don't you understand? Your leaving me has hurt me more than the physical boundaries. It's hurt me emotionally and mentally. I don't want to break like that anymore," I whimpered softly. Hot tears coursed down my face.

"Gabby. You don't get it. I don't want to hurt you anymore. You have to understand how much I hate it when I see you crying. I don't want to cause those tears even more. I love you. I don't want your tears to be sad. I'll always love you, to the end of the world."

"No. No. No. I'm not doing this again," I cried. I turned away, but Troy grabbed my wrist, pulling me into his chest. I struggled, pushing against him, but he just tightened his arms around me. Finally, I gave up. I allowed myself to be swallowed into his warm embrace.

"I'm not letting you go again." His blue eyes were stormy and adamant.

"How do I know that?" I whispered.

"I love you. I know those weeks were hell. They were hell for me too. I hurt when you hurt, Gabby. I'm happy when you are. I know I love you. And that's not going to ever change."

I let him raise my chin and stare at me. Under the pounding rain, he pressed his lips to mine.

"That's the reason I left you. But I'm never doing it again."


End file.
